The Christmas Dick
Free Express Shipping on all orders over 30.00
and 100% Hilarious
Over 5000+ 5-star reviews since 2017
Ho Ho Holy Shit it's already that time of year again and we're back in action baby!
We've upgrade literally everything about the dongs:
- almost 1/2 pound of Solid Chocolate Dong
- Handcrafted and hand poured MILK chocolate (new recipe for the holidays this year!)
- a super secret upgrade to our box that will make this year extra special. Yep, we're doing it.
Perfect for White Elephant, Secret Santa, Stocking stuffers, and all the holiday parties you're not getting invited to this year. Grab one or grab ten with our Cockin' Around the Christmas Tree bundles for the most epic Holiday ho-down this side of the Atlantic Ocean.
Merry Christmas, Happy holidays, and EAT A DICK
BUNDLE & SAVE
- Christmas Dick
- Jingle Balls Christmas Card
- Free Custom Message
- 20% off (retail 36.00)
- Christmas Dick
- Bag of Dicks Gummy
- Jingle Balls Card
- Free Custom Message
- Free 2 Day Shipping
- 30% off (Retails 49.99)
YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED
IS THIS CHOCOLATE EDIBLE?
Sure is! Each ding Dong is hand crafted with care by a certified chocolatier. 100% vegan and they’re absolutely delicious.
SO... HOW BIG IS IT?
This chocoalte turd packs a bunch at 4OZ or lumpy, vegan chocolate goodness. Fake poop is the funniest when given anonymously.
WHEN WILL MY ITEM SHIP?
Since all our chocolate is made fresh, orders are typically shipped within 2-3 business days. The processing time is in addition to the shipping option you choose. Please be Aware that during busy times like holidays, processing May take a little longer than 3 business days.
HAVE YOU EVER HAD A PROBLEM WITH MELTING?
We have tested these chocolates in warm conditions and they went unmelted, but we’ve also had reports in mild climates where they were left on the doorstep in the Sun and did melt. If you are concerned about the possibility of melting we offer insulated shipping boxes with cold gel packs for a little extra.
HOW DO I KNOW MY TARGET RECEIVED THE PACKAGE (PUN INTENDED)?
Each package is tagged and easily tracked online through our shipment tracking service. Once it leaves our warehouse, you Will receive that tracking number so you can check on live updates as the package reaches it’s Target.
Because what is better than sending an anonymous chocolate Dick to someone in the mail? There is something really special about knowing you have given something confusing with no hope of figuring out who the culprit is. That’s a special kind of torture.
This product is rated 4.8 of 5.0 stars.
It has received 1310 reviews.
Most of my purchases are sent to public or government officials that have managed to get on my radar for one reason or another. While they are sent anonymously meaning I have no knowledge if they arrived or not, I am actually anticipating a day when I'm prosecuted for sending obscene material through the mail to the recipient only to demonstrate to the public how deserving they are to get it.
If you're a cop or city official that received one of these gifts, there's a possibility that it came from me and you'll know why you earned it.
I order two, surprise my two friends, they find it so hilarious and they love it!
The irony of this email I tried to email support never heard back. Got one half reply from Adam but issue was never addressed lol.
Of course, we'd love your feedback on how everything went! Good or bad, it helps us get better. Plus you'll get a juicy coupon for helping us out. That's a win/win.
Have an issue with your order? Shoot us a quick email before reviewing so we can sort you out and make everything peachy keen.
My friend was hysterical with laughter when she opened the penis in a can! I will definitely order for other friends! A++++
Fast service and my friend loved her surprise! 😂