I Have a Small Penis! Never-Ending Prank Greeting Card

I Have a Small Penis! Never-Ending Prank Greeting Card

Some cards say “Happy Birthday.” Some say “Congrats.” This one screams, on repeat, for up to three goddamn hours: “I have a small penis!” That’s it. That’s the whole gag. And it’s genius.

The I Have a Small Penis! Never-Ending Prank Greeting Card looks innocent from the outside, but the second they open it, the torment begins. The sound loops endlessly, louder and funnier with every second. And the best part? It doesn’t stop. Closing it doesn’t stop it. Throwing it across the room doesn’t stop it. The only way out is destruction.

👉 Don’t be the boring friend with socks and candles. Send this card, ruin their peace, and make sure everyone in the room hears them confess their microscopic manhood.

Why This Card Is the Ultimate Prank

Because humiliation is hilarious - especially when it’s anonymous. This small dick prank card doesn’t just roast them once, it keeps going and going until they snap. Whether it’s your brother, your roommate, or your best friend who swears he’s packing heat, this card makes sure everyone knows the truth: “I have a small penis.”

It’s the perfect revenge joke, birthday prank, or gag gift for anyone who takes themselves way too seriously.

Picture the Scene

Your buddy gets a card. He opens it. The room fills with the phrase “I have a small penis” blasting like it’s on a megaphone. Everyone bursts out laughing. He panics, tries to close it. Nope, still going. He stuffs it under a pillow. Still going. He runs outside. Still going.

Finally, he loses it and tries to destroy it. Too late - everyone’s already crying with laughter, phones are out recording the meltdown, and you? You’re the mastermind who made it happen.

One customer said, “Sent this to my roommate. He ripped it apart after 20 minutes, but not before the whole house heard him ‘confessing.’ Still the funniest $15 I’ve ever spent.” Another wrote, “Got this for my brother’s birthday. My parents were there. Let’s just say it’s the last time he’ll brag at Thanksgiving.”

Why People Love This Prank Greeting Card

• Plays nonstop for up to three hours - no off switch, no mercy.
• Repeats “I have a small penis” - humiliating and hilarious.
• Made from durable cardstock - tough enough to survive their rage.
• Includes envelope - looks like a normal greeting card until activated.
• Shipped 100% anonymously - they’ll never know who ruined their day.

Don’t Give Boring. Give Chaos.

Normal cards? Snooze. Candles? Lame. A gift card? Pathetic. This? This is comedy. This is the kind of prank that becomes family lore. They’ll never forget the day their birthday, roast, or office party turned into a three-hour “small penis” chant.

👉 Click “Add to Cart,” send the I Have a Small Penis prank card, and give them the most unforgettable - and most humiliating - gift of their life.

IMPORTANT: Make sure you actually put your recipient’s name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it’s you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly.

**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**

*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer.*

***NOTE: If you are ordering the card activated, we assume the next person who opens the card is the recipient. That means, when the card is opened next, it will be triggered and you will not be able to turn the sound off.***