Merry Titsmas- Pop Up Boob Card

The Christmas Card That Pops Boobs, Not Boring Words

Forget mistletoe. Forget boring ass “Season’s Greetings.” This year, it’s all about tits. Big, unapologetic, cardboard tits. The Merry Titsmas Pop Up Boob Card is exactly what it sounds like - a festive greeting card that literally opens up to reveal a glorious pair of 3D boobs.

👉 Want to instantly win Secret Santa, ruin your aunt’s poker face, or give your buddy the best holiday roast ever? Click that buy button right now. This card is so good it’ll make Frosty melt.

Why This Card Wins Christmas

Because “normal” Christmas cards suck harder than a vacuum. Snoozy snowmen, shiny ornaments, sentimental crap that no one even reads. That’s not a memory - that’s recycling.

Now imagine this. Your friend, coworker, or unlucky cousin opens what looks like a sweet holiday card. They’re expecting a polite message, maybe a “Happy Holidays, love Grandma.” Instead? BAM. A pair of paper tits come popping out like a Christmas miracle. Laughter explodes. Drinks spill. Someone’s gonna choke on fruitcake. That’s not just a card - that’s a holiday story that gets retold every damn year.

The Scene You’re Creating

Christmas party. Drinks are flowing. Someone says, “Oh hey, here’s a card from you.”

They open it up. Boobs. Not reindeer. Not angels. Straight up pop-up boobs in their hands. Their jaw drops. The room goes silent for half a second. Then - chaos. Roaring laughter, phones out recording, and you standing there like the genius prankster who just turned Christmas into Titsmas.

That’s how legends are made.

What You Get

• Premium 14 pt cardstock - durable enough to keep those pop-up boobs perky
• Festive “Merry Titsmas” message on the cover
• Glorious 3D boobs inside (seriously, they pop like champagne)
• Cellophane wrapped with a crisp white envelope so it looks classy until it doesn’t
• Shipped 100% anonymously, because Santa doesn’t need to know you’re a degenerate

This isn’t just a gag gift. It’s the kind of prank that makes a party blow up with laughter and puts you in the Hall of Fame for holiday humor.

Perfect For

• Christmas prank - because nothing spreads cheer like cardboard cleavage
• Secret Santa gag - guaranteed to beat out candles, socks, or lame-ass coffee mugs
• Holiday roast - turn family dinner into stand-up night
• Office laugh - for the coworkers who can take a joke and need one
• Gag gift exchange - easily the #1 tradeable gift at the party
• Anonymous surprise - the best kind of mystery mail

Stop Being Basic, Start Being Legendary

Every year you buy lame gifts. Socks. Scarves. A bottle of wine. Forget that noise. This is the year you shock, offend, and make people laugh until they cry. The Merry Titsmas Pop Up Boob Card is how you upgrade from “meh” to “holy shit, who did this?”

👉 Don’t be another boring elf. Deliver tits for Christmas and own the holiday. Click Add to Cart before some other legend steals your idea.

IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it’s you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly.

**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**

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