EXPLODING Glitter Bomb Cards!

EXPLODING Glitter Bomb Cards!

NOTE: If you are ordering the card activated, we assume the next person who opens the card is the recipient. That means, when the card is opened next, it will be triggered and you will not be able to turn the sound off.

The greeting card that says “fuck you” in glitter

You know what sucks about normal greeting cards? They’re boring. They sit there with some Hallmark-approved poem that makes you roll your eyes. But this card? This card explodes in your face with a goddamn avalanche of glitter or dick confetti the second you open it. It’s called the Exploding Glitter Bomb Card, and it’s the most chaotic, petty, sparkle-filled “fuck you” ever disguised as a nice little envelope.

👉 If you’ve ever wanted to ruin someone’s day with joy and mess at the exact same time, this is it. Buy it. Send it. Sit back and cackle like the evil genius you are.

Why this card is savage genius

Glitter is the herpes of arts and crafts - once it’s on you, it never leaves. Weeks later, they’ll still be finding shiny little reminders of you in their carpet, their car, maybe even their pubes. It’s the prank that keeps on pranking. And because these cards ship 100% anonymously, you can pull off the ultimate glitter bomb drop without anyone ever tracing it back to you.

Here’s what makes the glitter card bomb legendary:

• Explodes on opening - instant chaos in a sparkly blast
• Multiple designs - pick a birthday card, a congrats card, or just a plain “ha ha fuck you” option
• Confetti twist - swap glitter for dick confetti if you really want to crank up the humiliation
• High-quality cardstock - this isn’t some flimsy dollar store shit, it feels real, looks nice, and lulls them into a false sense of security
• Shipped discreetly - no one will suspect a thing until they’re covered head to toe in shiny regret

Imagine the reaction

Picture it. Your buddy’s at his birthday dinner. Everyone’s watching as he opens your thoughtful-looking card. Then - BOOM. He’s coughing up glitter like a goddamn unicorn sneezed in his face. The table erupts. Phones out. Videos recording. His girlfriend’s glaring at him while grandma is trying to brush dick-shaped confetti off her mashed potatoes. Legendary.

And the best part? He can’t even be mad, because technically you did give him a card. It’s just not the one he expected.

When to send an exploding glitter card

The beauty of the glitter explosion card is how versatile it is. Anytime you need laughs, chaos, or petty revenge, this card has you covered:

• Birthday pranks - level up the cake and balloons with a blast of glitter
• Petty revenge - get back at a roommate, frenemy, or ex who needs a little sparkle in their life
• Bachelor or bachelorette parties - because nothing says “congrats” like dick confetti all over the floor
• White elephant or gag gift exchanges - your gift will be the only one people remember
• Just because - sometimes you don’t need a reason to ruin someone’s day with glitter

Why you’ll love giving this

Because it’s devious. Because it’s funny. Because it’s that perfect mix of childish and diabolical that makes you giggle every time you think about it. While everyone else is sending flowers, chocolates, and boring cards, you’re sending a glitter bomb card that guarantees maximum laughter, maximum mess, and minimum traceability.

👉 Don’t just say “congrats” or “happy birthday.” Say it with a glitter explosion they’ll be vacuuming up for months. Click buy now and unleash chaos in the sparkliest way possible.

IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly.

**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**

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