The Naughty Valentine’s Edible Arrangement: Chocolate Dicks, Gummy Dicks & Chocolate Buttholes
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100% Anonymous
and 100% Hilarious
Over 5000+ 5-star reviews since 2017
Description
The Naughty Valentine’s Edible Arrangement: Chocolate Dicks, Gummy Dicks & Chocolate Buttholes
Looking for a hilarious, slightly scandalous Valentine’s gift? Skip the cliché heart-shaped box and go straight for an NSFW edible arrangement packed with milk chocolate dicks, chewy gummy dicks, and rich dark chocolate buttholes. This bundle is the ultimate mix of sweet, sassy, and a little sinful.
💖 What’s Inside?
🍆 "Be Mine" Solid Milk Chocolate Dick – Because nothing says "love" like a thick, handcrafted chocolate surprise.
🍫 "Nuts About You" Dark Chocolate Dick with Crunchy Nuts – Tell them how crazy you are about them with SECOND chocolate dick
🍑 "Eat Ass" Dark Chocolate Buttholes – Because sometimes, dessert is all about the backside.
🍬 "I Thought You Could Use Some Dick" Fruity Gummy Dicks – A chewy, flavorful way to say "You're on my mind."
🎯 Who’s This For?
✔️ The Valentine with a wild sense of humor (because regular chocolate is just too basic)
✔️ That single friend who keeps saying they “need some dick” (we’re just here to help)
✔️ A bachelorette, bachelor, or Galentine’s party (this candy gets people talking)
✔️ Anyone who appreciates top-tier chocolate with a side of laughter
💝 Sweet, spicy, and guaranteed to get a reaction. This isn’t just a gift—it’s a conversation starter, a memory-maker, and the best way to send a message they won’t forget.
👉 Stock is limited—grab yours before they’re gone! Because nothing lasts forever… except our dedication to shipping dicks across the country.
YOUR QUESTIONS ANSWERED
IS THIS CHOCOLATE EDIBLE?
Sure is! Each ding Dong is hand crafted with care by a certified chocolatier. 100% vegan and they’re absolutely delicious.
SO... HOW BIG IS IT?
This chocoalte turd packs a bunch at 4OZ or lumpy, vegan chocolate goodness. Fake poop is the funniest when given anonymously.
WHEN WILL MY ITEM SHIP?
Since all our chocolate is made fresh, orders are typically shipped within 2-3 business days. The processing time is in addition to the shipping option you choose. Please be Aware that during busy times like holidays, processing May take a little longer than 3 business days.
HAVE YOU EVER HAD A PROBLEM WITH MELTING?
We have tested these chocolates in warm conditions and they went unmelted, but we’ve also had reports in mild climates where they were left on the doorstep in the Sun and did melt. If you are concerned about the possibility of melting we offer insulated shipping boxes with cold gel packs for a little extra.
HOW DO I KNOW MY TARGET RECEIVED THE PACKAGE (PUN INTENDED)?
Each package is tagged and easily tracked online through our shipment tracking service. Once it leaves our warehouse, you Will receive that tracking number so you can check on live updates as the package reaches it’s Target.
WHY?
Because what is better than sending an anonymous chocolate Dick to someone in the mail? There is something really special about knowing you have given something confusing with no hope of figuring out who the culprit is. That’s a special kind of torture.
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