Live Fast, Eat Ass - Edible Anus Chocolates

Live Fast Eat Ass - The Only Box of Chocolates That’ll Make Grandma Blush

Forget roses, forget heart-shaped candies, forget every boring-ass Hallmark gift that clogs up Valentine’s Day. You want to send a message that people will never forget? Then you send chocolate buttholes. Yes, actual edible anus chocolates. Four perfectly molded, handcrafted milk chocolate sphincters packed in a cheeky box that screams “EAT MY ASS.”

This is not a typo. It’s not a metaphor. You’re literally sending someone edible buttholes. And they’re delicious.

👉 Click Add to Cart right now before you chicken out and end up buying another sad box of chocolates like a coward.

Why the Hell Would You Send Edible Anus Chocolates?

Because basic chocolate is for boring people. Anyone can pick up a box of truffles from CVS. Big deal. But you? You’re about to send a box of chocolate buttholes that’s equal parts funny, shocking, and tasty.

• Valentine’s Day prank. Nothing says love like handing someone a box of edible buttholes and saying, “This made me think of you.”
• Anniversary surprise. Celebrate another year of tolerance with a chocolate anus instead of boring wine.
• Birthday roast. Skip the balloons and drop a box of edible assholes in their lap.
• Bachelorette party. The maid of honor just got her MVP gift.
• Random Tuesday. Because sometimes you just want to anonymously remind someone to eat your ass.

This is chocolate with a punchline. And it hits every single time.

The Sweet Details Behind This Dirty Joke

Each box of Live Fast Eat Ass - Edible Anus Chocolates comes with four handcrafted milk chocolate buttholes made from ethically sourced cacao. The molds are disturbingly detailed (you didn’t ask, but yes…they look real). They’re packed in a sleek little box that opens to the message “EAT MY ASS,” because subtlety is for cowards.

• Four handcrafted chocolates
• Premium cacao with an actually good flavor
• A box design that turns gift-giving into a roast
• 100% anonymous shipping so your secret’s safe

This isn’t some cheap novelty gag that ends up in the trash. People actually eat these. And they’ll tell everyone about it for weeks.

A Story You’ll Love to Tell

Picture this: your best friend opens what looks like a fancy chocolate gift box. They’re all smiles. They pop the lid and suddenly, boom, four edible buttholes staring right back at them. The room goes silent for half a second…then the laughter starts. Phones come out. Instagram stories get made. Now you’re officially the funniest bastard in the group.

This isn’t just a gift. It’s a memory. It’s a story that gets told at parties, holidays, maybe even their wedding toast years from now. And you’re the legend behind it.

Stop Thinking, Start Sending

Listen, you’re not here to buy something polite. You came here because you’re the kind of person who understands that life’s too short for boring gifts. Nobody remembers a card. Everybody remembers the day they opened a box of edible buttholes.

So stop scrolling like a coward. Hit that Add to Cart button, send this box of edible anus chocolates, and watch the legend of your prank spread faster than glitter in a strip club.

👉 Do it now. Don’t overthink it. Greatness favors the bold…and the assholes.

IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it’s you that ends up with the box of buttholes, albeit deservedly.

**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**

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